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| August 2, 2004
By Irish #19
Days 14-16
|  NARCh Ends with a Silver Lining - More Championships - Team Mission Detroit takes Platinum Senior, Finally Winning a Gold - Division 1 Goes to Team Tour.
We are now working on our wrap up that will encompass more of the final days of play.
But I don’t care anymore because it’s done and over and towards the end, well, it took a lot just to look at you people. Never in my life have I seen so many future parolees in one place acting as if they won’t enjoy the time they will get in prison. I look forward to my days in prison, as I hear the drapes are much more colorful and tasteful now that Martha Stewart is designing them.
I watch the news and it reminds me of a 3 day kegger and the mud at Woodstock a la 1968, and my head is pounding so hard that it seems bats are actually in my brain. Then, I see Shayne Arsenault playing video games and saying to customers at his Factory booth: “Dammit leave me alone, I am about ready to discover the meaning of life” as he gets the crap knocked out of him by some fast fingered 10 year old with a grin shy of three teeth.
As you all know by now, primarily BECAUSE I HAVE TOLD YOU OVER AND OVER AGAIN, that I am living on Vicodan, Actually, its hydrocodone, the generic form because I believe why buy the original when you can buy a generic fact simile that is cheaper? Kind of spells out my life in an odd sort of hitting the bull’s-eye on the target kind of way. But the reason I bring up my use of legal drugs is the fact that for the last few days I thought I was in a Vicky-haze when I observed what the Mission Pro players were wearing.
I mean, for goodness sakes, I had no idea the uniforms were actually real. I just thought I was flashing back to 1968 and it was ten minutes after reading a Batman Comic Book where the Penguin was the lead character and some guy named Joe Cook had turned evil somehow and well, it was very strange. That very night I sat down with John Kerry and we said to each other, you know the American people really are fricken stupid and the only problem is that G.W. is even stupider than they are. At least I thought it was John Kerry. It could have been Fast Eddie from Tour Hockey. Like I said, I was in a serious haze and it was getting very scary. I kept seeing Ivan Drago right before he went out to face Rocky Balboa, and you know, I felt you had to be Ivan Drago not to get me to smile at the Mission Uniforms.
Anyway, I am glad it is over. I got tossed out of my hotel room for burning up the carpet with lighter fluid, eating all the donuts at the breakfast bar, taking a bath in the Washing Machine, peeing in the pool, and answering the door to the cute little Russian Maid with a fur hat and saying: My name is Mishka and like your Vodka’s Miss Colliniski. Go figure.
So here I sit on the train tracks, hoping I can type up the rest of this before my battery stops. Daryn stiffed me on a plane ride home because of that carpet burning problem and so I am hitching a ride on trains. They don’t know I am doing that, but what is good enough for Woody Guthrie is good enough for me.
Let’s get to the action:
Division 1:
Division 1 was taken by Team Tour based out of St Louis. They took on the Anaheim Mission Bulldogs. It was a close battle, but Team Tour pulled out a 4-3 win.
35 and Older:
35 and older was punctuated by Overtime. In the Bronze medal game the Lizard Kings came up short, 4-3, in OT against the Iowa Spirit.
In the Gold Medal Déjà vu, Bordercats fell to cross town rivals Team Mission Detroit, 2-1 also in Overtime.
Silver Division:
There was great action to wrap up NARCh with the Silver Division.
Atom:
The Mission patriots took the Bronze, in a 5-4 effort over locals Cincy Swords. In the Gold Medal game, it was all Wildcats as they beat another local team, 8-2, over the Cincy Storm.
Gold – Wildcats
Silver – Cincy Storm
Bronze – Cincy Swords
Mites:
The number 1 seeded Mission Patriots took on a tough Skatetown Swords in the first semi-final match and beat them, 6-4, to move into the finals. In the other semi final game, Mission AKS San Clemente 94 upset the second seeded Anaheim Mission Bulldogs, 6-4, to move on to the final.
The final pitted the Mission Patriots and the underdog AKS team, and the patriots had their hands full in a close game, but they were able to finally put away AKS with 5-4 Overtime win.
Gold – Mission Patriots
Silver – Mission AKS San Clemente ‘94
Bronze – AMB
Squirt:
The St Louis Flex declined to follow conventional wisdom, as they came into their semi final the underdog. The Flex initially took on a heavily favored Mission Patriots and in a squeaker, won it 4-3. In the other semi, Mission Excalibur winning their game, 3-1, over the Blue Diamond Blades.
In the final game, the St Louis Flex did not have enough, as Mission Excalibur from Arizona won it 4-1.
Gold – Mission Excalibur
Silver – St Louis Flex
Bronze – Mission Patriots.
Pee Wee:
Arizona won Gold here, as they beat the York Mission Triumph.
Gold – Team Excalibur Black
Silver – York Mission Triumph
Bronze – Mission Patriots
Senior:
In one semi final game, Number 1 seeded Mission Lucky Charms ran out of luck and lost to TMD 6-2. In the other semi, Winnipeg Blue Devils beat the Rink Rat Bombers 6-1.
In the final game, another close one, as TMD took down Winnipeg in a 2-1 Overtime win.
Some Things to Think About:
Here are some interesting things that we have seen, and we really haven’t tried yet to put it all in perspective.
First, out of the medal winning teams, Mega Mission had 25 medal winners, and Tour Hockey, who many consider is the underdog, won 18. More Gold medals went to Tour sponsored teams.
Also, as to programs, it might be surprising to some that the new kid on the block, Team Mission Detroit, won more medals than any other organization, with 6. St Louis Blast/Team Tour, Anaheim Mission Bulldogs and Tour Bordercats each had 5, OC Blades got 4, and Mission Snipers got 3.
In Regions, California got 28 medals, Michigan got 18, Missouri had 9, and New York won 7. Eight remaining areas could do not better than 3.
NARCh 2004 is over. It’s in the books. Full wrap up to follow.
To read Irish #19's previous articles on NARCh 2004 see the Latest News section.
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